[HOROSCOPE] Wednesday, September 5th
The Game Rag gives you your video game horoscope for today, September 5th.
Aries
It's about time you got around to playing that game you haven't played in a long time. Pick up that controller and take "control" of your life! Twilight Princess is just waiting to be finished. It's your day to do so!
Taurus
Be careful while at work or school today. You will be tempted to play that Nintendo DS or Nintendo DS Lite or Game Boy Advance but don't give into its whims! Your favorite game, Zelda or Mario or Donkey Kong or Pokemon or Metroid can wait until you get home to be finished.
Gemini
BioShock is a hard game to finish, isn't it! Don't worry though, you will find time in your crazy life to play it. Probably right after you get off of work and right before you go to sleep (after dinner, of course).
Cancer
If you feel tempted to buy a PS3 today, do it! There's no better time than the present to get yourself that new video game console. It will do wonders for your health!
Leo
See Taurus.
Virgo
See a psychiatrist.
Libra
Video games have become very important to you lately. I can tell because you emailed me about getting that new Xbox 360 fixed up. Have you tried Hexic 2 yet? You might just like it! You might not. You'll have to send me an email telling me which so that I can write you a proper video game horoscope reading next time.
Scorpio
Knock it off! You know what I'm talking about. Just because your dad is a big player on the Mortal Kombat scene doesn't mean you can strut around like some big stallion or something. You're just a shadow of your father's greatness. Deal with it.
Sagittarius
Have you even left the house lately? I really think you should think about making some friends. It's time. Second Life is not a real community. That's why they call it "virtual."
Capricorn
That goes for you too, WoW-man.
Aquarius
Your life is about to change! You've just become mayor of a 16-bit town. Let's see what you can do to bring in the people and boost your population. Your $8 purchase has given you power, so use that power wisely. Go with nuclear power - it never explodes.
Pisces
You've been alive too long. Kill yourself. Like, literally kill yourself. I don't mean in a video game.